Finding My Way After Unemployment

I’m learning that employment at this age comes with a new version of the Sunday scaries: the dread of trying to figure out what I will do during the upcoming week. It’s a different kind of anxiety than the pre-workweek jitters I used to know. As someone who truly dislikes being bored – and I vividly remember a friend in my 20s telling me, ‘I think you get sad/depressed when you don’t have anything to do’ – that comment has stayed with me for years, and I totally believe it’s true. Although, when I was working full-time, I would often pray and wish for some extended time off to do whatever I wanted. Finally read that book gathering dust, take long leisurely walks, or simply indulge in whatever my little heart desired.

Well, the universe certainly forced my hand with the recent layoffs, and now, I have time, plenty of time, a copious amount of time to do everything on that mental wish list. And it was all well and good, a delightful period of freedom, until I gradually ran out of those immediate ‘want-to-do’ things. Now, this past Sunday, I found myself surprisingly sad that the weekend was over, watching as most people geared up to return to the familiar rhythm of their workweek, while I faced a week with seemingly no inherent structure or readily apparent daily purpose. In a moment of seeking guidance, I even googled and asked ChatGPT to help create a schedule for the week, but somehow, those generated plans felt flat and ultimately didn’t quite hit the mark. I realize now that I crave real, meaningful structure, something more than just filling hours.

So, I’m definitely on a path to finding another fulfilling job, that much is clear. But in the meantime, I’m also actively exploring taking certifications in areas that genuinely interest me. This feels like a proactive step, a way to invest in myself and build new skills. Yet, even with this plan, I still recognize the need for that inner drive and a clear sense of purpose to truly thrive during this unexpected chapter. It’s about more than just having things to do; it’s about feeling like what I’m doing matters, that I’m contributing and growing.

And you know what? I’m starting to see this time not just as an empty space to be filled, but as an opportunity. An opportunity to explore new passions, to delve deeper into those interests I never had enough time for, and to intentionally build a week that aligns with my values and aspirations. This isn’t just about finding another job; it’s about consciously creating a life that feels purposeful and engaging, regardless of my employment status. The initial dread is slowly being replaced by a sense of hopeful anticipation. This week, instead of just letting the days drift by, I’m determined to infuse them with intention, learning, and maybe even a little bit of unexpected joy. This isn’t the end of the story; it’s the beginning of a new, self-directed chapter, and I’m excited to see where it leads.